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Friday Joke


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On Fridays we tell a joke on The Daily English Show. Click on a joke title and share the joke on your favourite social network. Click on the "I don't get it" picture to see the joke explanation.
 
 
 
We share the drawings from Friday Joke on Flickr. You're welcome to use them as long as you credit us.
 
 
 

#50 Witches Fly On Brooms

Why do witches use brooms to fly on?
Because vacuum cleaners are too heavy.
 
From Friday Joke on Show 872.

#49 Mice Screw In Light Bulb

How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two, if they're small enough.
 
From Friday Joke on Show 865.

#48 Biscuit Goes To Doctor

Why did the biscuit go to the doctor?
Because he felt crummy.
 
From Friday Joke on Show 858.

#47 Pink And Fluffy

What's pink and fluffy?
Pink fluff.
What's blue and fluffy?
Pink fluff that’s holding its breath.
 
From Friday Joke on Show 851.

#46 Marijuana In The Wood

A man rings the FBI and says: "I'm calling to report my neighbour Tom! He’s hiding marijuana inside his firewood. "
"Thank you very much for the call, sir."
 
The next day, FBI agents descend upon Tom’s house and search the shed where the firewood is kept.
 
Using axes, they bust open every piece of wood, but find no marijuana.
 
They swear at Tom and leave.
 

That evening the phone rings at Tom’s house.
"Hey, Tom! Did the FBI come?"
"Yeah!"
 

"Did they chop your firewood?"
"Yeah, they did … "
 

"Happy Birthday, Buddy!"
 
From Friday Joke on Show 844.