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Friday Joke


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On Fridays we tell a joke on The Daily English Show. Click on a joke title and share the joke on your favourite social network. Click on the "I don't get it" picture to see the joke explanation.
 
 
 
We share the drawings from Friday Joke on Flickr. You're welcome to use them as long as you credit us.
 
 
 

#20 Strongest Man

A strong young man at a construction site was bragging that he could outdo anyone in a feat of strength. 
“I am the strongest, most powerful man here,” he boasted. 
He made a special case of making fun of John, one of the older workmen.
After a while, John had had enough. 
“Why don’t you put your money where your mouth is?” he said. 
“I bet you a week’s wages that I can haul something in a wheelbarrow over to that building that you won’t be able to wheel back.”
“You’re on old man,” the young man replied.
John reached out and grabbed the wheelbarrow by the handles. 
Then, nodding to the young man, he said, “All right. Get in.”
 
From Friday Joke on Show 643.

#19 Paper Clip And Magnet

What did the paper clip say to the magnet?
I find you very attractive.
 
From Friday Joke on Show 636.

#18 Aussies And Kiwis

An Aussie bloke is having a quiet drink in a bar and leans over to the big guy next to him and says, "Do you wanna hear a Kiwi joke?"
The big guy replies, "Well mate, before you tell that joke, you should know something. I'm 190 cm tall, 125 kg and I played as a forward for the All Blacks.The guy next to me is 185 cm, weighs 115 kg and he's an ex-All Black lock. Next to him is a bloke who's 2 m tall, weighs 120 kg and he's a current All Black second rower. Now do you still want to tell that Kiwi joke?"
The first bloke says, "Nah, not if I'm going to have to explain it three times."
 
From Friday Joke on Show 629.

#17 Six Plus Four

Teacher: Now class, I’m going to ask you a question and I want you to all answer at once. How much is six plus four?
Class: At once!
 
From Friday Joke on Show 622.

#16 Taxi Crash

A passenger in a taxi tapped the driver on the shoulder to ask him something. 
 

The driver screamed, lost control of the cab, nearly hit a bus, drove up over the curb and stopped just inches from a shop window. 
For a few moments everything was silent in the cab, then the driver said, "Please, don't ever do that again. You scared the daylights out of me."
 

The passenger, who was also frightened, apologized and said she didn't realize that a tap on the shoulder could frighten him so much.
Then the driver replied, "No, I'm sorry, it's really not your fault at all. Today is my first day driving a cab. For the last 25 years I have been driving a hearse.”
 
From Friday Joke on Show 615.